“It does not take 5-6 years to determine if that’s the person you want to marry,” they say.

maybe it depends more on the person and where they are at… are both parties dating to marry, and if so, where do they stand?

because marriage for only the purposes of love doesn’t seem sustainable. love is not enough because when you don’t want to love that person, you will look for a way out.

marriage is more of a commitment than love is. people can argue “well if you don’t commit to them, then you don’t really love them” when the truth is you can love people and still prefer not to be in the same space as them if we want to argue unconditional love exists.

because marriage is not unconditional, the conditions have to be met to sustain the marriage. The commitment says “I will work to sustain these conditions” – most people who divorce just treated love as the condition. it was a poor one.

but what do I know about marriage? I’m only 3 years in with the person I’ve been with for almost 8.